There is more than one kind of orgasm. I remember discovering this little-known fact at age 18, when I had my first lover that wasn’t a confused teenage fumbler, but actually had some experience in lovemaking.
The orgasm I knew until that point, a sort of building tension that then released, was pleasurable, and I didn’t have any trouble “reaching” orgasm. I could trigger the release of the tension any time I wanted, which was usually at the moment my teenaged fumbler ejaculated. As far as I knew, I was a fully functional sexual woman.
But with this lover, I found myself experiencing something much vaster and more profound than the release of some physical tension at the point of orgasm. Something beyond pleasurable. Once, I even blacked out at the point of orgasm. And then there was the first time I squirted some mysterious liquid when I came …
Welcome to the mysterious and fascinating world of the female orgasm!
Many women never experience orgasm at all.
Some of these women have stress or trauma, which prevents the body from performing its normal functions. Some have inept partners, who don’t provide the right stimulation for long enough for the woman’s body to reach orgasm. Others have bodies which can and do orgasm, but they block awareness of the orgasm from their conscious minds.
Women can have an entirely pleasurable experience of sex without having anything they would call “an orgasm”. This can frustrate goal-oriented men who consider sex a “performance” and the number of orgasms their “scorecard”.
The tension release orgasm
The first orgasm most women experience, and the only one that many ever experience, is the basic tension-release orgasm.
Sexual stimulation builds up a form of pressure, like inflating a balloon. When the balloon “pops”, the tension releases rapidly, with a pleasurable sensation. This is the form of orgasm women tend to discover for themselves if they experiment with masturbation. This is the orgasm that helps us get to sleep at night.
The clitoral orgasm
As we begin to expand our sexual explorations, the next orgasm that most women encounter is the clitoral orgasm. Direct stimulation of the outer nib of the clitoris, under its little hood, produces much more intense sexual sensations than stimulating the rest of the vulva area.
Clitoral sensations can be so intense as to feel almost unbearable, but when we are highly aroused, we can cope with the intensity. As soon as we climax, however, the clitoris seems suddenly extremely sensitive, and we can’t bear to have any more touch there for a while.
The clitoral orgasm also produces a tension release, and immediate laziness or sleepiness in many cases.
It is not always the case that stimulating the outer clitoris will produce a clitoral orgasm – there are many other forms of orgasm which can develop from clitoral stimulation. The clitoral orgasm is distinguished by the feeling of hypersensitivity around the clitoral hood, and the feeling of lethargy.
The clitoris is much bigger than the little nib that emerges above the urethra. It has several arms, including in the erectile tissue in the labia, and thick arms extending on each side of the vaginal cavity.
This means that stimulating the inside of the vagina, near the entrance, will stimulate the internal clitoral tissue.
This can produce a range of sensations, such as warm waves moving up the body, specific points of pleasure inside the vagina, and generalised pleasurable sensations throughout the torso, neck and head.
The G-spot orgasm
Most of us have heard about the G-spot. Some of us even know where it is located, and a select group have a partner or a favourite dildo that knows exactly how to touch it for maximum results.
The G-spot orgasm tends to have a localised peak in the area of the G-spot, and then, often, flow-on effects throughout the body. As it builds towards climax, it can create a feeling of needing to pee, and resisting that feeling can prevent a G-spot orgasm. It is all about letting go and trusting at this point!
The cervical orgasm
Movement in the area of the cervix can trigger orgasms very deep in the body, involving the muscles of the uterus.
The cervix can be difficult to reach, depending on the woman’s anatomy, and the area is often tender with stored tensions and traumas. For years, I always winced when a guy bumped up against my cervix. It wasn’t until I had some Tantric massage and released some stored tensions that I started enjoying the movement of my cervix.
These orgasms are reputedly the most powerful for raising consciousness to higher levels.
The anal orgasm
Yes, there are pleasurable areas that are best reached via anal sex!
Of course, men have it much better in this department, with the prostate, the male G-spot, located in this area.
Women can and do orgasm through anal intercourse, if it is done well. Anal sex is something to try slowly, carefully, and with a lot of lubricant.
Full body orgasms
In reality, you won’t be limiting your stimulation to one specific area, and the different types of orgasm will overlap and merge together. In the best sexual experiences, it becomes impossible to tell which part of your body is producing any given sensation, and your entire being vibrates with ecstasy.
You may notice effects such as numbness of the tongue and throat, tingling all over, paralysis in parts of the body, uncontrollable movements, and unusual vocalisations – or it may be an extremely serene and peaceful experience of bliss and oneness, where you lose the sense of having a body at all.
Yes, women can orgasm from nipple stimulation alone!
Actually, once a woman’s awareness is awakened, and she fully inhabits her body, the entire surface area of her skin becomes one gigantic erogenous zone. Any sensation becomes exquisite, and an avalanche of sensations becomes overwhelmingly exquisite, producing full-body orgasms.
Kalas is the word the Tantrics use to refer to the mysterious fluid produced by some women during sex.
Conventional wisdom says that “squirting” only happens during G-spot stimulation, but that is actually a myth. Kalas can emerge during vaginal sex, external stimulation (for example, oral sex), and even when there is no direct stimulation of a sexual nature (if you are already in a highly aroused state from previous sexual activity).
Yes, people can and do pass out from intense orgasms!
Strength training to increase your bandwidth for energy movement can enable you to hold on to consciousness as the orgasm shoots up your body – try Tantric hatha yoga, sublimation kriyas (cleansing practices) like nauli kriya and agnisari dauti, and masturbating to more and more intense orgasms by holding off as long as possible (and for men, holding off completely from ejaculation – you will get the blackout orgasm instead of the ejaculation).
Remember, this list is not a scorecard, and you don’t have to experience every possible kind of orgasm (or cause them in your partner) to be a successful lover. Paradoxically, the more you try to perform, or “get somewhere”, the less likely you are to experience (or create for your partner) any kind of orgasmic pleasure. So chill out, give yourself permission to relax and enjoy sensation for its own sake, and see where the journey takes you.
Woozers do many kinds of orgasm! Have you experienced them all or some of them? Or even other kinds? Share your experiences in the comments below.